Move Over Frank Sinatra, I’m the New Chairman of the Board

 One of the best experiences of my life was being in a fraternity during college. There are a lot of preconceived notions about what it’s like being a part of a fraternity. Some are misconceptions, but most of them are probably true. I gained so much more from my experience than just the “Animal House” antics people think about. Not only did I make friends that I will know for the rest of my life, but I was given opportunities to lead my chapter and practice skills that couldn’t have been taught in a class.           

As it turns out, Tau Kappa Epsilon (TKE) continues to give me chances to learn and grow. For over a year now I have been a member of the Board of Advisers, which basically acts as an oversight committee for different functions of the fraternity’s business. We provide consistent leadership and oversee the finances and housing for the undergraduate chapter. We aren’t running a billion dollar business, but it’s still good experience for a 29 year old.           

During our most recent meeting the Board’s Chairman resigned. I was nominated, accepted and was voted as the new Chairman. This position comes with a pretty big burden of responsibility, but it is also a big opportunity for me, not only because it will give me practice in things I wouldn’t have otherwise been exposed to, but it is a chance to help turn around my struggling chapter and actually make a difference in those kids’ lives. It’s also kind of awesome on a resume.           

I’m never afraid of a new challenge. I’ve always known I’m capable of doing most anything I want out of life. I do these things to push myself and gain exposure to people and situations. I have no doubt that the skills I learned from being in these leadership roles have helped me in the real world. Whether it’s running a meeting, speaking in front of people or mediating a disagreement in my office, TKE has made me better at it. And, one day, when I’m a board member for another organization, TKE will have helped me there too.           

There are several of my friends from high school who don’t understand why I’m so invested. In fact there are several of my college friends that ask me why I care so much. The best reason I can give is that the opportunities that I was given through this organization have made me a better person today, and if I can help give that to someone else, then it’s worth the time I’ve invested.           

The way I look at it is this is a great opportunity for a 29 year old, I just hope I don’t let anyone down. I told the group at the meeting that I had a lot to learn, but my toughest critic will always be myself. I’m always so critical of myself and such a perfectionist that if anyone ends up disappointed, it will be me most of all

Lies Guys Have Told Me

So I think the title is pretty self-explanatory. Dudes, c’mon… get some new material. I’m on to you…

Here are six lies guys have told me… Continue reading

Are you ready for some Football?

Football is back! Most men (and some women) everywhere can rejoice. Right now, during these two weeks before the season kicks off, is the happiest time of the year. Every team has an equal record, and everyone’s team still has a chance to win it all. Find me 16 weeks from now and I’ll probably be singing a much sadder tune, but for now my hopes are high.

I am a Cowboys fan, and it’s a pretty deep obsession. I grew up in their glory days of the 90’s, and have been patiently waiting for those days to return. I have 10 different Cowboys-related websites that I check daily, probably 20 or so Cowboys gurus that I follow on Twitter, and at least four different apps on my iPhone that give me regular push updates about the Cowboys every day. I also get caught in regular arguments on Facebook trying to defend the Cowboys from haters. I will also go on record saying that the only tattoo I would ever consider is the Cowboys star.

I can’t explain why I get so worked up about this sport or my team because I didn’t even play football as a kid. I do like the pace and excitement of a game compared to other sports. I like the intense strategy that goes into every play, much like a game of chess. I’ll admit also that I enjoy the violence. I just can’t imagine getting tackled by a 300 pound guy who has practiced mauling people his whole life. I don’t know how a person gets up from something like that, even if they are wearing pads.

My anticipation is even higher than usual this year. My Cowboys have made a good number of smaller improvements that overall add up to a much better team. The head coach has created a system and brought in specific types of players that compliment his system, while cutting the older guys and creating more competition at each level. Their defense is going to be top five in the league, and for once, everyone is underestimating them instead of overestimating, and that is an extremely good omen for this team.

So ladies, don’t judge your men for being a bit crazy during football season. It’s in our DNA that we must watch football when it is on, like an uncontrollable force guiding our hands and eyes. For me, a loss means I will be in a terrible mood all week, and I bet I’m not the only one. So bring on the chips and queso and fire up the grill. I cannot wait to sit on my couch all Sunday, every Sunday, for the next five months

My Mom Thinks I’m a Lesbian

You don’t know me, so to you I very well could give off the vibe that I’m into other girls (not that there’s anything wrong with that!). It’s just that…how does a single 23-year-old girl convince her very Catholic mother that she very much likes boys?

You might think I’m exaggerating, but I went home a few weeks ago and I was talking about some of my friends from work with my mom. She asked (for the billionth time) if I was dating anyone from work. Now, I work with all attractive 20-something year olds so this isn’t an outrageous question, but regardless the answer is still no.  Then, she ever so slyly leaned over and whispered to me, “your friends probably think you’re a lesbian.”

I talked to my friend Derek about it and he had a simple answer “why don’t you just tell your mom that you like to bang dudes?” Well, obviously that’s not an option because my mom would then find out that her precious little daughter no longer holds onto her “V card.”

I am so sick of having my mom turn every single date I go on into my future husband. The first thing she asks when I tell her about a date is, “what’s his last name?” because obviously we need to make sure it sounds good with my first name. The second thing she says is, “I’m glad it went well – is he ok with moving back to Buffalo once you’ve had kids?” And if she was joking about either of those things I wouldn’t be writing this post OR emotionally scarred for life.

Last summer, my cousin got married and of course I didn’t have a date for it because if I did that would basically be like showing off a diamond ring on my left hand.  While at the wedding, a few different people came up to me and asked me about my new boyfriend…new boyfriend? Well that’s news to me! After a little research, I found out they were talking about a guy I went on two dates with… obviously my mother had to tell everyone about my new boyfriend of two dates so they wouldn’t think I was a lesbian.

It’s because of things like this that I do not tell my mother about any boys I’m dating anymore, which causes her to think even MORE that I’m a lesbian. It’s a vicious cycle with no ending!

My Meeting with a Career Coach

I’ve been throwing out the “I don’t know what I want to do with my life” speech for a couple years now. So for my 25 birthday my Godmother decided to buy me a meeting with a career coach. She’s had great success stories with her employees at her hotel and even her son has gone to see this guy. So I happily agreed hoping I would automatically know my next career move.

I was prompted to take a 60-question test before our meeting. I was supposed to choose out of two statements the one I relate to the most. For example, “In a stressful situation do I, a) become angry or b) distance myself from the situation,” and so forth. The results are based on which “color” you are. Red, blue, yellow, and green…a common test that most high schoolers or even college students take in class.

The next step was the actual sit down and reading of my results. We quickly introduced ourselves and then got right down to it. With only knowing my name and my answers to the 60 question test, for one hour he rattled off basically every emotion, angst, thought and action I had ever felt.  Based on my results I was a Blue and Green, which according to him is a very rare combination. The first question he did ask was, what was my current job? Like every other time I have to answer this, I begin this long spiel about me in the business world, this wasn’t my plan, I have no plan, yadda yadda, yadda. After my minute long answer he replies, “well, I can tell you that Blue’s and Green’s aren’t comfortable in the business world, and by the sound of your response this is a true statement.” With a nod of my head I was ready for an hour of this guy knowing every little thing that made me uncomfortable and what type of person made me the most uncomfortable…I’m talking about you Reds. 

Let me give you the breakdown of the different colors:

-Red: Doers

-Yellow: Talkers

– Blue: Thinkers

-Green: Controllers

So basically I like to control every situation I’m in…not the people in the situation but what’s going on. I don’t like surprises, I don’t like change and I over think every situation….again he replies with “so basically your brain is never stopping, you’re always thinking about what’s going on and how you can either a) be the best at it, b) not screw anything up, c) get out of it or d) how can I do it better next time.”  Again, he had me pinned to a T. Even though I already knew this about myself it was weird to have someone I’ve never met know so much about my personality.

So before our meeting was over I asked him what career paths do most Green and Blue’s take. His response, “they’re mostly artists, do you play an instrument?” Umm, no…what does that mean?! Am I supposed to be playing an instrument? Am I supposed to quit my job and pick up painting?! After my quick response of no and the look of “what the hell am I supposed to do now” on my face he quickly said that Green and Blue’s strive in any environment because we follow rules, we’re team players and we work hard. (I’m still a little worried that I missed my calling in water colors).

His final comment, which was probably the most spot on, “Green and Blue’s aren’t risk takers, they’re comfortable where they are, which is probably why you’ve stayed in the business world for almost two years (oh, hit me where it hurts). You need to take more chances.” Which I replied like most Green and Blue’s, “I don’t want to fail!” His best response ever, “you won’t fail! Green and Blue’s can’t fail, they think too much to fail.”

Even though this meeting didn’t give me a clear vision of what my next step should be, it did help me realize that I do need to take more risks. I may fail (hopefully not), but if I do I know I’ll learn from it and move on. And who knows, maybe I’ll find some kickass job in the music industry where Green and Blue’s are all around!